This Crazy Life

On Mourning

I was doing it wrong, and I knew it. It was one year ago today, my mom had just died, but I wasn't crying. "Something's wrong with me," I confided, oh so quietly, to those closest to me, a week later. They assured me there was no right way, no wrong way, to grieve. That… Continue reading On Mourning

Furry Family, Health & ME/CFS, This Crazy Life

Saving Myself By Saving a Dog

This story starts with a dog, and ends with another. It's long, and touches on sensitive subjects, with raw, open, honesty. The last 10 months have been quite a journey, full of sorrow, shock, a moment of extreme clarity, a lot of contemplation, reflection, unexpected dreams, and then resolution, when the dream became reality. It… Continue reading Saving Myself By Saving a Dog

Furry Family, Life on The Mountain

A Good Death

"Veterinarians deal with death the most out of any medical profession." "Does it ever really get any easier, euthanization?" asked the first year student. "Every euthanization is difficult, but some hit harder than others..." - from "Vet School" (TV show, NatGeo Wild) Is there any such thing as a good death? A beautiful, peaceful, passing?… Continue reading A Good Death

This Crazy Life, Wolfdreams...

Moonlight Diamond Benedictions, Beauty, and Magick

Pull up a chair, my tribe, and I'll tell you a story, of the Before Times, which I rarely speak of - of my life before illness, which was an unusual one by anyone's standards. It is a bitterly cold night here on the Mountain, 8 degrees and snowy, and gazing at that snow, so… Continue reading Moonlight Diamond Benedictions, Beauty, and Magick

Furry Family, Health & ME/CFS, This Crazy Life

15 Years: Time, Memory, Remembering, Forgetting, and Stupidity

It's funny, what I forget, even now, after so long being sick. Sometimes, in my mind, I am still strong & healthy, as if time simply stopped passing when I became ill. Sometimes, it really feels that way, as if time did stop, and there is only The Before Times and a giant blur that… Continue reading 15 Years: Time, Memory, Remembering, Forgetting, and Stupidity

Health & ME/CFS, This Crazy Life

I Will NOT Go Quietly Into The Dark

In my last post, I said I wanted the fire, the passion, back in my life. Over the last few weeks, I've done a lot of deep thinking and reflecting, while struggling every day just to keep my ship from sinking. Well, I've come to some harsh realizations and conclusions, and I'm feeling pretty damn… Continue reading I Will NOT Go Quietly Into The Dark